Seeing as how inspiration seems lacking of late, here's a repost of one of me most favouritest of me pomes.
If you say there's no god, you're a fool;
You're ignoring our circular rule
That the Bible is certainly truth
And we know it contains its own proof
Because it's divinely inspired
And to doubt that's to call God a liar—
Which proves that the Bible is right
And Jehovah's the eternal light.
(Don't question, you'll only get dizzy;
Don't examine too close, then it's easy.)
So now that we've proved he's extant
We have to obey some commands
For 'though he created our urges
They need to be put through some purges.
Although he is perfect and great
He made us with inbuilt mistakes.
(Once again just accept—don't look close,
And you'll find his perfection no boast.)
Those urges he gave us are bad
Which is why he sent down his own lad
—Who is also his ghost and his dad—
To sacrifice him to himself
So we wouldn't all end up in Hell.
(Belief, once again, is no task,
If you'd only shut up and don't ask.)
But faith's still a prime requisite;
We have to believe ev'ry bit
Or we'll end up in eternal pain
'Cause of knowledge our ancestors gained
By eating the fruit of a tree.
(Just believe! It's easy. You'll see.)
So there's ways we're expected to act,
To keep up our end of the pact.
These bad things, perfectly built in
(Imperfections that we know as sin)
Must be fought against daily by us
(Don't lie, don't cheat, never cuss,
Never question his wisdom or love)
If we want to gain Heaven above.
Oh, by the way, I am his voice—
In proxy, I offer this choice;
To avoid endless torture, don't wait!
(Though his limitless mercy is great.)
If you wish to be let through his gate
Place your ten-percent tithe in the plate.
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