Good King Wenceslas looked out
On the feast of Stephen;
Said Let's light the neighbourhood
For the Christmas season.
Brightly, shone his Santa Claus—
The holly round his windows.
Lights adorned his roof and walls
And neon traced the h-e-e-dge-row.
Never mind that climate change.
Sod the bloody fuel bill.
Let's waste some power yet again
In beat the Joneses duels 'til
Our carbon-footprint's size twelve-b.
Let's beat the Blackpool Mi-i-le.
Let's escalate! You'll ne'r beat me,
For I'm so infant-i-i-ile.
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