Advertisements: one 'd.' Therefore 'ads,' not 'adds.' 'Adds' is the present tense third-person singular of 'to add.'
Dear Morrison's supermarket,
What the hell is the point of selling mince pies in a nice Christmassy box, when the use-by date is some time in late November?
Trickle-down economics: the theory that the vast and ever-expanding reservoirs belonging to the extremely rich might one day overflow a little bit.
And as I type, I've just heard my first pre-Guy Fawkes night Extra-Loud The Apocalypse Is Upon Us And The Sky Has Just Caved In™ firework. Oh joy.
On that topic though, the cynic in me has never been certain; are we celebrating that fact that Fawkes et al got caught before blowing a bunch of politicians to Kingdom Come, or lamenting that fact that they failed? Tricky one that. Now if the target had been a bunch of bankers…
Climate-change denialism: the theory that the human race can pump out two-and-a-half million pounds of CO2 per second, and it magically won't have any noticeable effect on the atmosphere.
Common sense is usually not the former when it truly is the latter, and not the latter when it is the former.
If the invisible man's eyes are completely transparent, how does he see?
Being interested in the origins of life, the thoughts of long-dead Greeks etc etc (or, indeed, how invisible eyeballs could work): nerdy—and not as a compliment.
Knowing the final score of a football match played on January the second nineteen seventy three: perfectly reasonable.
Run that by me again…?
Never judge a book by its movie. (Sign spotted in the book section of a charity shop, many years ago.)
An armed society is a polite society: the theory that walking on eggshells in case the nutter with the portable killing-machine takes offence and decides to blow your head off, is the same thing as politeness.
And I think that'll about do us for now. For the benefit of those of an American persuasion who've subscribed since I last mentioned this though, I'll finish on one I've mentioned before…
'Tidbit': a bowdlerisation of 'titbit.'
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