Eton Trifles: The Principles Of Jacob Rees-Mogg

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Harken unto the words of the right honourable member (pun definitely intended) for North East Somerset, Jacob Rees-Mogg. Or, as I think of him, the Eton Trifle (because "Eton Mess" was, obviously, taken by Boris Johnson and because I'd be a lot happier if Mogg was, in fact, unconsidered):

Says Freddy Gray in his defence of the execrable Moggie:

Most people, however, are intelligent enough to see a man of principle – a thing Westminster politics lacks – standing up for what he believes, and they like it.

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Rampant Hypocrisy

I keep running into atheists…

Who are absolutely, one hundred percent in favour of abortion when discussing the edicts of various religious sects, yet cheer for a president who has pledged to appoint pro-life judges to the supreme court and who, on his first day in office, reinstated the Mexico City policy, a policy which, says Wikipedia, "blocks US federal funding for non-governmental organisations that provide abortion counselling or referrals, advocate to decriminalise abortion or expand abortion services."

Who are oh, so quick to comment on the morals of clergy and other religious figures who commit sex-crimes, yet cheer for a president who, amongst many, many other misogynistic statements and actions, openly boasted of having sexually assaulted multiple women.

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The Holy Foetus

In Northern Ireland, two hundred and five women have signed an open letter admitting to having broken Northern Irish law by either taking abortificients or obtaining them for others. This in response to the planned prosecution of a woman (unnamed, to protect her daughter) who obtained such drugs on behalf of her young daughter.

For those who don't know, Northern Ireland's abortion laws are just about the most restrictive in Europe, with abortion only being legal in cases where the pregnant woman's (not 'mother,' thank you—that word does not apply until after the birth) health is at risk, or in cases of foetal abnormality. Well, technically legal. In practice, even that isn't guaranteed. As Amnesty International puts it…

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The Double-Hypocrisy Of The ‘Pro-Life’ Argument

Okay, so here's the 'pro-life' premise:

A foetus is a person, and abortion is therefore murder.

Which doesn't really get us very far, as it doesn't address the pro-choice premise, which is:

Even if we were to consider the foetus to be a person, no person has the right to the use of another person's body, even in cases where they need it in order to survive.

So in order to balance this, we need to add the unspoken but implied clause into the 'pro-life' argument:

A foetus is a person whose right to life trumps the right to bodily autonomy of its host. Killing this person is murder, therefore, even if the host cites her own right to bodily autonomy.

Now both statements are addressing the same problem. But here's where we hit a snag…

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Woman Blasts Anti-Abortion Protesters Outside A Clinic In London

This, Gentle Reader, is a truly righteous rant. Power to that lady's elbow, I say!

The background, however, is sadly much less inspiring:

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Another Brick In The (Uterine) Wall

With apologies to Pink Floyd…

We don't need no contraception.
We don't want no birth control.
Don't want children? Don't have sex, then.
Dontcha know your body's not your own?

Hey! Women! Your body's not your own!

All in all you're a dirty slut and a whore.
Yeah.
All in all you're just a- nother slut and a whore.

We don't want to hear opinions.
We don't want you having a voice.
A walking womb, you've got no rights, you're
Pregnant or celibate, that's your choice.

Hey! Women! You got no rights or choice!

All in all you're a dirty slut and a whore.
Yeah.
All in all you're just a- nother slut and a whore.
Just an incubator, you're not a person anymore.
Yeah, just another filthy slut and a whore.
Another filthy slut and a whore.
Just another filthy slut and a whore.
Repeat to fade.

—Daz

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Reframing: Call It What It Is

I'm tired of having the nice, polite-sounding Why should we have the right to stop child-circumcision? debate. Let's call it what it is. Let's have the open and frank Why the hell should you be allowed to mutilate your children's genitalia? debate.

Likewise, let's not have the Why should abortion be legal? debate. Let's have the Why should we force women to donate the use of their body to another organism? debate.

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On Pre-Natal Onanism

This one's for Representative Michael Burgess

I was bashin' the bishop before I was born.
I'll be pullin' the pullet 'til I'm dead an' gorn.
'Cause on the human species I'm a disfiguring canker;
I'm a tea-partyin' Bible-bashin' woman-hatin' wanker.

—Daz

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