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Posts Tagged ‘grammar’

Having fallen asleep over a book containing lots of quotations from letters and what-not from the seventeenth century (Antonia Fraser's The Weaker Vessel; which I highly recommend), I half-woke up several hours later and, for some reason, couldn't stop pondering on the seemingly ubiquitous non-use of apostrophes therein. Some vaguely-remembered advice from an English Language teacher on the subject of writing which was meant to be read aloud versus writing which wasn't, kind of bubbled to the surface. When confronted with a sentence containing many "s" endings, he told us, if the sentence is to be read aloud, be sure that there's no possible confusion between possessives, plurals and words which merely happen to end with the letter.

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Merriam-Webster Blues

if u can;t be botherd 2 write it rite y shd i bother 2 read it not a full-stop or comma in bluddy sight and u dont seem 2 kno y u need it mayb ur shift-key broke amiright? coz capital letters r missign aswell did ur carridge-return meat th same plight? is merriam webster ur idea ov hell? if u care enuff 2 speak atall y do u not bother 2 make it clear? wot u justrote makes no sens atall en my english teacher just burst in2 tear’s so if u cant be bothered 2 rihgt it rite ill b fuked if ill bothr 2 read it

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Okay, I could have gone with Blogging In Brief or Blogging In Short but they wouldn't have been half as much fun. Sticking with the underwear-theme, Blogging In Sparkly Y-Fronts crossed my mind, but I managed to dislodge it after a quick nip of vodka and a few careful headbutts to the nearest wall. So Spandex Hotpants it is. And if you're actually imagining me sitting here writing this whilst wearing spandex hotpants, then I pity you—I very much doubt that it's a pretty sight! Here, have a nip of this vodka…

Anyway, the idea is that I've been a tad busy the last few days, and haven't had time to do more than skim various blogs and news-stories, let alone actually spend time writing anything about them, plus I've a handful of vague ideas I've been mulling over that probably don't even deserve a full-on post of their own, so here they are in brief. Or hotpants, as the case may be.

Standard disclaimer: It's a mixture of the serious and the not so serious, in no particular order, and no denigration of the importance of the former is meant by its proximity to the latter.

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